3 Days down to KBOX with my sister. I hope she will not cancel it. Definitely going to sing this song, 暗恋 by David T.

Am I 知足的小孩 or not interested?


My Sis ask me if I am going to change my handphone? I think my answer was I don't know. I am not interested in any phone right now. I would like an iPhone. I feel that i don't touch my handphone as frequent anymore, i feel that i use it for basic communication and simple application. I don't love taking photo as before and only use camera for convenience.
I think i have things i need such as handphone, digital camera, ipod nano, mini lap.


I feel that I am lucky to have such things in my life. Some things i really cannot afford last time. I feel lucky to have my family that to share to purchase all these wonderful things-my ipod,camera,extra CPU.


I was shopping at ION with my sis earlier on, and happen to see a secondary school girl able to afford something from Zara. Sharing my thought with my sis, in my days, I was wearing giordano or girdano junior stuffs(i can fit in)- I'm quite TU(old-fashion). I feel that she should be feeling lucky or very happy that she can afford this. This handphone i'm holding, is the very first time i paid using my salary from my part time work.


"There is more wants than needs" I used to be this kid and I still am now but not as bad as it was. Always compare and analyse. I mumble and analyse about a bag i saw at spring field just now. In the end, i decided to give up on the bag. The reasons:
1. after discount, it's still 70+ though i can afford now
2. it's only a canvas bag, there are other place selling similar stuff
3. I am not willing to pay so much for the bag and buy the bag means paying for the brand.


Today's shopping(7 hours) conclusion:
My sis-grey belt and leggings(abt 50)
Me-A belt (13)
Food(lunch and dinner)-50+

Been thinking alot lately. about the things happen past weeks. many horrible things happened.



the things i'm so piss is that someone block me and the others, which i think she is really being so childish. Come on your are a grown up, ask yourself how old you are. or maybe all along you are a faker and you really act like the other one that we don't like all along. or maybe both of you are a identical not related twin behaving totally like an idiot. not that i don't respect she, but she is where too not so much to deserved the respect. and i really learned my lesson from the past. Once bitten twice shy by not going too near you. i can't really say i like you so much. i really knows who you really is......



it's time to put a full stop to whatever my life is about right now. A new beginning or new life or new attitude or maybe change. I can't help to think about many things on how people treated me in the past. I bear grudges-i know friends,family who backstab me, talk behind my back, giving me hot and cold attitude treating me like a transparent sheet. I know i know all of this but i am not that person who will confront you and turn our relationship sour. its will not be fine, even things are thrash out, there are still some issues that we will always remember and not being fine with it. it is not like in a movie, you thrash things out and everything will be fine and back to square one. I know what is going on and i am not a total idiot. I have eyes, ears, feelings alright. I might act like an idiot too OK. I have compromise too much in relationship with friends and family which many. Everyone have to give and take, it's not about your own one way street, there are many other streets.



My family will have the first priority in my life. They will always stay with you no matter up or down. BUT SOME FREAKING ASSESSSSSSSS TIME FOR YOU TO WAKE UP. YOU WANT SOUR SHIT. YOU WILL HAVE IT. BREAK TIES!!!!???? GROW UP OK.!!!! PUBLISH IT IN THE PAPER!!!! AND ALSO ANOTHER ONE GROW UP TOO!!!! IT HAS BEEN YEARS!!!! TIME TO EXPAND YOUR BRAIN. THINK!!!! TO THESE 2- BE MAGNANIMOUS.

Ooo, i have just realised she deleted me as her friend in facebook. Ok i shall do that too. I have every reasons to do that because i'm younger than her, so i shall think something smaller than her age. Can't help it because i am just so PISSED. Not thinking logically but who cares.

O Janice ,if u happen to read this. Do the same thing. Block, delete her from facebook, MSN. And we shall celebrate it over a good dinner and cheers.

I do not have any conflict with her directly and she chooses to do this which making ppl so piss. So once and for all we are all done. WE ARE DONE!

It is really time to change! I will be a total real bitch if you step into my boundaries. So if people wants it their way then it will be my own high way. I do not owe anyone a living except my family who i consider them my family. I will be my life.

Today is my first day of holiday after my exams. I am not excited about any thing. I'm feeling moody. It might be due to the lack of sleep...i don't know... im lazing around my matress with the mini lappy.

Our dearest Ku Kong has past away, we believe he is in better comfort in another world. For the about 2 month, everyone in the house have been very tired going to the hospital. Many of us have to cut what we are doing and rush to the hospital and i have temporary stop work! My sis and i is jobless now, there is no definite source of income every month. Tears keep flowing alot for the pass few days whenever all of us whenever we thought of Ku kong and the rest of the grands in our family. Everyone is so stress and often we have used the wrong expression and tone when communicating to each other and pissed each other off.

So unfortunate, the funeral happen to fall on my sis and mine exam week. I thought i can manage to study after the day of funeral, but my sis and i realize it was hard to focus on our studies. The morale was down even when we went out to study.

Many things happen, which i have seen many true colours of people. "Respect" is the most important value in family and i truly depise someone who is not respectful to people in my family regardless if that someone is in my family. Every thing will turn back to square one and i rather things become the way was.

I really need a holiday and i am going really going for a holiday. A very short holiday to genting next thursday, at least a short trip to have fun. This semester has been quite a stressful one, and also there are things that i do not have the time to do. There is no one to really turn to, it is time to learn to take care everyone around me. The most important thing is to cherish everyone around you.

After a nice meal after friday noon, i became so giddy and i couldn't stand in balance....I think it should be my low blood and stuff again....kind of feel horrible....

and it drag till saturday afternoon... I'm so lucky to have my aunt giving my some soup...after taking about 2 bowl of soup im feeling so much better...i don't feel that giddy anymore....The soup really helps...hehe

i'm feeling kind of giddy/sleepy????now....i think must the the lack of sleep...I hope i will be fine tmr morning after a nice sleep....hehe

It's 6.23 am and i am not sleeping and i have no intention of sleeping. I have just finish doing sonicgear materials again due to not up to satisfactory. I have lecture at 9am and i won't be taking a nap as i know i will definitely oversleep. I shall bear it till end of the day and i hope to have a good night sleep after school.

Yesterday(thursday), cheryl, zi jun, maner and I went to watch Harry Potter. Well i think it's great, i am always quite please with the movie. Finally, i get the chance to meet maner after like 2 year? The last time i saw her was a KBOX session when i was in year 1 in poly. This time round i miss a kbox session with them...

There is lots mixed feeling within me. I shall mention some only. I can't help it but to complain here and there in my blog. Nobody will ever listen and understand what i really mean.

With all the projects and event coming, it is really making me pissed and frustrating. I'm beginning to hate email so much as there area always so many emails coming in and all of it is all projects projects and projects. Moreover, i'm so deprived of sleep because always staying up late waiting for people replies and also have to do more work and work and work. I feel like im going to get crappy marks....

There is no time for myself anymore. I do not have the time to work, shopping..... and i feel people around me is getting like prettier and nicer but not me the same old ugly duckling that has the nerd spec and surrounded by the books and paper. I'm just a geek to people! I'm sleepy right now and i really feel like sleeping. If i were to sleep now i can't finish thing on time tmr and i have to head down to sonicgear during noon. Damn!